Maybe this is it, maybe not.

I’ve been coping with the uncertainty and newness of this foster care journey pretty well, I think. I’m a little bit scared that I’ll no longer be frantically trying to get things in order after I receive a placement call…because things keep falling through or getting solved. No one wants to be caught with their pants down, order is crucial to most of us. Luckily, I’ve got a type B personality and I don’t often freak out about things. I’m scared that one day I’ll agree to placement (like today, I’ll tell you more in a sec) and I’ll go about my daily business and not go pick up clothes or find extra backpacks and KABLAMO kids will appear at my door.

I just received a call from our placement agency, a female 6 and a male 10. I said yes, because I’m all about the yes word and going with the flow of this crazy foster care system. The children currently go to school in the town over, it’s about an hour and a half away. One of my blogger friends was recently faced with a situation similar to this and ended up taking the children to school pretty far from her home. I made sure to ask if they could be transferred to a local school and was told yes. Bloggers and blogs are your friend, read them and communicate with other foster patents because we really can learn from one another. I’m forever grateful for the friends and insight I’ve acquired from communicating with those who are doing the same things, facing the same struggles, and share a lot of the same feelings I’ve had.

I was told that there is a pretty good chance that these kids would be placed with is because we are in the same county. However, you should be getting a good of a feel of how things are around here in the foster care world, and just like me you know that nothing is certain. Here’s to another round of the waiting game! Cheers.

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I’m pleased to report that the newest children, we had agreed on taking into our home, from out of the area have been placed with family members. That makes me feel happy; the less trauma the better. But, I’ve learned a little bit more about how foster care actually works versus how the PSMAPP ‘taught’ us it would work. We had been taught that the caseworkers reach out to family members first then when they’ve exhausted family options then they call foster families to see if they can place them in their homes. It seems as of its the exact opposite, they call foster homes until they get a ‘yes’ then they call family members using the foster family as a back up plan. That is absolutely fine with me but I figured I would let you In on this ‘secret.’ I’ve decide to keep it up with a yes answer when my licensing worker calls with a placement because I can always retract my yes after speaking with the case manager. The more you know, cue rainbow.

In other news; I’m pleased that members of my community have reached out concerning foster children, placements, adoptions, etc. That makes my heart happy. I got word this morning that some of our cheer girls were involved in a serious car accident last night, one of the girls is Bunny’s coach, luckily they’re all okay. They’re still going to the Summit tomorrow, viva Florida. Go Sonics! Tonight is our weekly date night, I’m looking forward to it. I’ve made sure to have the seven most recent pictures from my Instagram account show up on my sidebar on this blog. Boy, this was one hot mess of a paragrap

We got a call…we said yes.

The kids are from out of the area, a 6 year old female and a 12 year old male. I didn’t ask too many questions, my worker actually volunteered WAY more information this time. I like that. I still don’t know if they’ll come or not…I guess you never know until it happens. Cross your fingers for us and send us a prayer or 10.

Five Senses Poem

Written by Boychild

In the sunny sandy Glamis resting

I see my dirt bike and 4 wheeler and my dad

I smell the gas odor from the motors

I taste my icy water

I hear the vroom vroom of the desert vehicles racing across the sand.

I am proud of this kid, he has been on honor roll, his reading and writing skills have skyrocketed, and his attitude is much better than it was at the beginning if the school year. Plus, this poem is awesome.

Things I have learned about foster care in the last week.

First, let me tell you that the children from out of the area did not come to stay with us, instead they had them sleep in an office for two days before placing them in a home in the area. I had also gotten another call yesterday asking if we would take two females, 10 and 6. Based on what little information they provided, I was comfortable taking the girls. I requested more information. I was told the case worker would call me. Humm…haven’t I heard that before? If I remember correctly EVERY case we had been contacted about, and asked if we would take children, I had requested more information about. I was told that the case worker would contact me and fill me in on the children. Cool, right? Wrong. I have NEVER been contacted by any case worker.

You see, I’ve noticed a trend…if you ask too man questions you get skipped. I’m beginning to think they just go down the list of homes and ask in short, “yes or no,” and if you say no or request more info you get skipped…too much work is my best guess. I am going to conduct an experiment, next time they call I will say yes, despite the amount of information (within my comfort level) they can provide. I am willing to be big bucks that children will be placed immediately. I know that this is the name of the game, I know that there is a lot of unknowns in foster care. How hard is it to tell me which school they attend, what medical conditions (if any) the children may have, and why they’re being placed into care? These are the questions I am asking; I am not asking what their favorite foods are, what color hair they have, or if they ever got beat up on the last Tuesdays of the month at Bible Camp. I am not being difficult.

With all this negative stuff flowing freely, I feel the need to update with the positive side too. I recently spoke with an on call worker, she was a complete joy. She kept me informed on the children who were from out of the area, even after they were placed. I really appreciate her following up and understanding that I am, factually, emotionally invested in children…even if they are strangers. I felt relieved when the children were placed and appreciated the text messages. If I knew her name I would speak praises but I cannot remember. I have her number saved in my phone as Nice On Call Lady so I can remember.

What’s next? More waiting. I know this is all part of my plan, I know this is a lesson I need to learn, I know. I don’t like it but I know. You got me God, go you. I’ll continue to wait.

We got a call…

We received a call today about a brother and sister who are from out the area, I’m currently waiting on he caseworker to call me and fill in some gaps that the on call person from the agency didn’t know. The girl is 8 and the boy is 10, neglect and substance abuse is the cause for removal. They’re currently trying to find a home for them in their current city… if it fails they’re going to get back to me. Let the wait begin.

They’ve come and gone. Back to a family of 6.

The kids are gone, they left us Thursday night. I was sad to see them go but not too much…the kids will still see them at school and I told them that they can come visit anytime. After the kids left we packed up and left Thursday night to San Diego, originally we planned on leaving Friday morning but things just sort of worked out so we left.

We spent a lot of time at the beach, a lot of time at the San Diego State University, and a lot of time with friends. Bunny and her team placed FIRST! And Biscuit and her team placed SECOND. Our gym had a great run, FOUR first place wins, amazing! Not to mention special awards too! I am extremely proud of our Sonics, I cannot wait until next season. The next season starts soon, tryouts are the 18th and 19th of May and right before that we have a 8 day skill prep camp here in town. Oh, and Biscuit will be going to Woodward West with the Sonics in June, in California! The person who deserves an award for best kid brother in the world goes to Boy Child; he sucked it up and took this cheer competition like a champ. Poor kid, he liked looking at the girls but after 2 hours he was done and just wanted to be somewhere else. He powered through 6 hours a day at the arena and I am mega proud of him. Husband wasn’t too keen on it either but he was a champ, he helped take kids from here to there, he packed around bags and coats and whatever teammates asked us to hold, and he fed nearly a whole cheer team of girls when they were hungry. I’ve attached a video from the Anaheim competition and will post a video of the San Diego competition as soon as I get it.

Aaaand, a couple pictures too, because I am one proud mama!

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Biscuit and her team hitting it!

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First place for Bunny’s team!

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Boychild rock and rolling.

When will we get new foster kids? How many will we get? Will they be as great as our first set? The wait begins again…

I’ll take ‘Who Has Two Thumbs and Two New Kids’ for 600, Alec.

Last night Husband and I were blessed with two wonderful children, they’re an absolute joy! D is a female, 12, and incredibly helpful. She is also a friend of my oldest daughter, they attend the same school and are in one of the same classes together. A is 9, and silly! He attends the same school as the other kids but my son, or daughter, didn’t know him previously. The kids are both polite, interesting, and really engage in everything! This is not what I had expected, to be honest I expected a lot of trauma, anger, and hostility. I am overjoyed to be proven wrong! The kids are all getting along well, so far, and I can’t believe it, this is happening! IT’S REAL! It’s taken so long, I feared that this day would never come but LOOK! It did. It happened. It’s real. This is my life. My heart is full.

D & A, (who are siblings, did I mention that?) arrived last night around 5:30pm. My oldest daughter and youngest daughter we’re at a party in Parker, Arizona and I didn’t know when they would be returning. I had been partially hosting a progressive dinner (going to multiple homes for multiple courses of dinner) for the church youth group and had about 20 humans in my house, luckily we wrapped it up minutes before the kids arrived. Lemon was in a foul mood as she hadn’t napped all day and Boy Child was grounded and doing extra chores. I was in the kitchen marinating chicken and prepping dinner and DING DONG! The kids had arrived, they were polite and we showed them their rooms. We gave them a quick tour, told them to make themselves at home and if they needed anything to let us know.

They immediately went to the back yard and played happily on the trampoline for a good 30 minutes. After a while they migrated to the Xbox and played games and then chaos struck again! All of a sudden Biscuit and Bunny we’re home, along with 4 other children and their mother. Kids playing loudly, things being thrown, screaming…you know, the usual. But you know what? The kids didn’t miss a beat, they all said hello to D & A and the kids quickly fell into everything. Chatting and playing, and just being kids. I LOVE THAT ABOUT KIDS. As adults we get hung up an itty bitty things and overanalyze, not kids. Nope. They just play, we have a lot to learn from children. Dinner came a went without an issue and then bedtime was flawless.

This morning, holy crap. I felt like I was herding cats. Everyone needed something. No one could find anything. Fast forward 40 minutes later, it’s all calm and good. I heard Boy Child talking to A in their room, it was absolutely amazing. Boy Child asked about his family and other siblings, he asked about their culture, he asked if he felt safe now, he asked if we did anything different that his family. I had a, silent, proud mama minute. My boy he is compassionate, caring, and inquisitive. I must be doing something right!

I recently found out that an acquaintance of mine was a foster child and later adopted by her foster family, she reached out and I am so grateful! I’m anxious to hear her experiences and input…and bug her for advice when things get hairy, I know they will.

Have a wonderful day, I know I will!

So many calls!

We have been getting calls non stop from our agency looking to place kids and for respite. What’s respite? That’s pretty much baby sitting another families foster child/children while they attend to personal matters. Respite sucks, in my opinion. Everything is uncertain, in my experience, things have fallen through. Also, if you’re providing respite you get pulled off the call list for a more ‘permanent’ placement. I have decided that respite isn’t for me; it’s such a pain in my butt. I did agree to do respite for 3 days next week but I’m unsure if it will pan out as it’s fallen through so much. I was hoping we’d have a couple of placements to take with us to San Diego next Friday … we will see.

Husband and I missed a call for a 4 month old baby girl one night while we were brushing our teeth and such. I called back 4 minutes later and she had already been placed. FAST. This was not something our training mentioned, how quickly things go. There is no easing your way in, there is no testing the waters, it’s more like sink or swim! I typically roll with the punches very well but when 4 kids need placement one minute then the next minute 2 kids then a new family has 3 the following minute, it just, wild. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. It’s a massive learning curve.

My weekend is going to be busy! My BFF and her family are coming here tonight from Kingman, AZ to spend the night. We have a birthday party on Saturday in town, a birthday party on Sunday in Parker, AZ then we have to rush back home in time to partially host a progressive dinner for our church.